Building a Grandmother

I have two beautiful grandchildren: Gracen and Griffin (see photos).  For many years I have been studying grandmother-skills by watching and listening to others.  Let me explain—

• Lesson 1 from my mother-in-law Evelyn:  She gave unreserved love to Todd and Beth, her grandchildren.  No requirements.  No restrictions.

• Lesson 2 from my best friend’s mother JoAnn: She made sure she was a presence in her grandchildren’s lives.  When they moved to another state, she vowed that she would see her grandchildren at least every three months…she has kept that vow for over twenty years.

• Lesson 3 from my friend Bobby:  She told me (long before I had grandchildren) that we parents spend long hours raising our children so that someday they will be wonderful parents, and then all we grandparents need to do is love and enjoy our grandchildren.

• Lesson 4 from an experienced grandmother who taught the validation of her grandchild’s imagination (this experience told to me by her daughter):  A note on her front door one day when her mother was babysitting: Please let yourself in.  Tommy (her grandson) and I are in the back yard hunting for tigers.

• Lesson 5 from my daughter-in-law Jill: She as the belief (and I share her wisdom) that her children can not be loved by too many people.

• Lesson 6 from me:  As I watch my daughter-in-law raise Gracen and Griffin with skills I don’t possess and ideas I never had, I realize that there is more than one correct way to raise children—Who would have guessed!

And so, I am “Mimi,” the grandmother that everyone built. I guess it took a village.